Limping Along - 4

Tender: Bumpers Grill, Broomfield, CO

Classification:  Upscale

Date & Time: 4:00PM, Sunday, September 21, 2014

Intro:  I'd like to thank my two VIP guests Courtney and Aaron for accompanying me on this adventure.  The atmosphere inside of Bumpers is strange.  Peanut shells litter the floor, couples find it necessary to suck face at all times, and strange men drinking whiskey sing lullaby's by the juke box.  There are 2 pool tables, a foosball table, Big Buck Hunter, a pinball machine, multiplayer trivia, and an outdoor volleyball court.  Despite all of these amenities, the real vortex of fun is across the street at a joint called Chipper's.

The Order:  The tenders are somewhat tricky to find on the menu, and appear to only be on the junior's menu.  After giving up on the tenders, I was alerted by Courtney that they are on the menu as a dish labeled "Strips 'n Dip.  At a $7.59 price point I was skeptical that would be supported by a pile of french fries, but my waitress assured me fries were included.  As would later be discovered, she didn't know who I was, or why I was at this joint.  

The Meal:  My 6 golden tenders were served with a generous bowl of ranch, which made me smile.  I knew there was plenty of ranch to out last the tenders, which is rare at most places.   What wasn't included were the french fries.  I suddenly found myself smack dab in the middle of every tender enthusiast's biggest dilemma.   Should I wait for the fries, or dig into the tenders?  Waiting meant that my tenders would not be at the peak of their potential.  Digging into them would have meant I wouldn't have any fries to compliment the tenders.  I decided not to wait.  The tenders were much better than I had thought they would be upon entrance to this establishment.  The chicken itself was quite tender, but a bit on the dry side.  What really hurt this tender was the batter.  It was crunchy, and paired perfectly with the dimensions of the poultry cut.  However, something was missing.  I still can't put my finger on what spices should have been used, but the battered lacked a zest I was looking for.  When the fries finally arrived, 3 tenders later, they too left something to be desired.  Most of the fries were cut way to wide and had a soft limp presence.   3 pitchers of Dales Pale Ale weren't enough to disguise the embarrassment the fries bestowed upon this place.

Brickyard BBQ Chicken Tender Score:  

Outer Layer - 5.5/10 

Chicken - 6.7/10

Overall - 3 Strip Basket

Not including french fries a tender entree is unacceptable. Bumpers is a place where one can easily get carried away with the amount of beer on tap and outstanding people watching that takes place.  Perhaps more pitchers of beer would help mask the flaws in the tenders I noted.  If you plan on making an appearance at this joint, I would recommend staying with a liquid diet.  Each of our throats were scorched by the pico de gallo that was served with the made in house tortilla chips.The black and blue burger and Mexican salad that my VIP guests ordered also scored very low in their eyes.

 A Nugget on the McNugget:  The 4 Mcnugget shapes are bone, bell, boot, and ball.

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